Akira stood over the stove, frying bacon for herself and her cottage mates. After everyone filled their plates, she placed leftovers in the refrigerator, washed the pan and wiped down the kitchen surfaces. Her cooking and housekeeping skills were honed by years of helping her parents take care of her younger siblings.
It was her last full day at Epworth, and her housemates and cottage staff felt sad at saying goodbye to the sweet-natured, soft-spoken Akira. But her bags were packed and she was looking forward to National Guard training school, and afterward, her first semester of college. At just 18 years of age, Akira had already served a year in the Guard. With a parent’s written permission, she had joined and completed basic training the summer between her junior and senior year. Basic training had taken her away from home for the first time.
“While at basic training, I told someone what had been going on in my home,” she said.
Akira told an investigator about the abuse she had experienced since she was 12 years old. She had been repeatedly warned by a family member not to talk about the abuse and was told that doing so would destroy the family she loved so much. So, for years, she remained silent. She controlled what she could in her life by working hard to get good grades, joining the softball team, and participating in ROTC. She endured.
But as she grew older, she learned more about the psychology of child abuse and realized that her younger siblings were also in danger. She realized she needed to expose the abuse to protect her siblings as much as herself.
The investigation that followed revealed that the accused parent had spent time in prison for a similar crime earlier in life. The authorities removed Akira’s siblings from the family home to live with foster families. Following basic training, Akira came to live at Epworth.
At Epworth, she finally felt physically safe. Although she missed her siblings terribly, she was relieved to know that they, too, were safe. It helped that a caseworker with the South Carolina Department of Social Services was able to create an arrangement for the siblings to spend time
together each month.
Still, Akira struggled with the news that the parent who harmed her had been arrested. Even more painful to Akira, her other parent chose to defend and remain in the relationship with the abuser. She pulled out a photo of herself as a fourth grader, her arms wrapped tight around the parent who later harmed her. She flipped through photos of each of her siblings. Despite frequent moves and financial stress, she said family life had in some ways felt secure and comforting in her younger years. She felt loved. She and her siblings spent every Sunday in church.
“As I grew older, the difference between what was being said on Sundays and what was happening at home made everything even harder to cope with,” she
said. “I knew it wasn’t God’s fault, but it made it hard for me to trust God with my troubles.”
While the year she spent at Epworth could not erase that traumatic link completely, it made a start by exposing her to faith that is protective and comforting,
and one in which actions matter. It offered her hope that one day, she would be able to fully trust God again, she said.
With the help of counselors, house parents, tutors, and faith formation and activities staff, Akira was able to spend her senior year of high school concentrating on her schoolwork and her future. She took steps to make herself as self-sufficient and independent as possible.
“I don’t know that you could find a harder working, more focused, or determined individual,” said Christy Mooneyhan, Epworth’s Director of Academic
Advancement. “Akira recognized that she was capable of being successful despite circumstances and she took advantage of every opportunity that she had.”
Akira completed several college classes during her senior year and even earned a professional healthcare certification that gave her the ability to make a living in the short term should it be necessary. She also worked part time. She spent a weekend each month with the National Guard. She applied and was accepted to college.
Akira says that once she earns her bachelor’s degree, she hopes to attend graduate school for a health-related degree. The Guard will pay most of her
educational expenses. In the future, Akira may have opportunities to help others who have experienced child abuse.
With Epworth’s help, she is moving forward with hope, filling up her life with the kind of accomplishments that will help her feel safe in the world. She is building good memories to help outweigh the bad ones. Day by day, she is creating a strong, successful adult life for herself so she can help her younger sisters and brothers. She has already made a difference in their lives.
