Bernice Porter Riggs of Lexington remembers the cold December day in 1951 when her father dropped her and her three sisters off at Epworth. At the time Bernice, nicknamed Bunny, was 10, and her sisters were 7, 8 and 12 years of age.
Until then, the girls had spent most of their lives with their grandparents in a dilapidated rural home. Their mother worked long hours at a textile mill. Their father, a soldier, spent most of his time on base. When at home, his alcoholism created chaos. Bernice remembers it as “awful.” The children had no toys, and the home lacked running water. Most years, they received no gifts for Christmas.
Everything changed when Bernice’s mother asked her father for a divorce. Although her father had physically abused her mother, a judge awarded him sole custody of Bernice and her five siblings. Everyone in the family, including her father, knew he could not care for the children on his own. So, Bernice’s grandfather contacted a Methodist pastor, who helped arrange for Epworth to take the four girls. Two older children went to live with family members.
Bernice was relieved to be away from the turmoil of home. She recalls thinking that the 250 or so children living at Epworth must be rich because they had their own swimming pool. Once settled in a cottage, Bernice made friends easily and threw herself into her schoolwork and chores. She had fun learning to crochet, sew, play chess, swim and cook. She enjoyed and appreciated the church services she attended. Starting in the 8th grade, she worked part-time in the Epworth kitchen, where she “learned the trick to making good biscuits.” Her mom visited Bernice and her sisters regularly.
An Epworth house parent noted in Bernice’s permanent record that she was a polite, positive child and easy to care for.
“Bernice gives us no trouble,” the note said. “She gets along well with the other girls and frequently does them favors.”
Bernice remembers the thrill she and other children felt receiving a silver dollar each Christmas from a local businessman. Along with the other residents, she wrote Christmas wish list letters to Santa that were forwarded to Columbia College so student groups could purchase one or two modest gifts from each child’s list.
“When I was 13, I wrote a letter to Santa asking for a beautiful teal blue sweater and skirt set, knowing full well I wasn’t going to get it,” she said.
To Bernice’s shock, she did receive the outfit of her dreams along with every other item on her list courtesy of a childless Methodist couple from Aiken named Fred and Sarah Ponder. In that era, families could volunteer to ‘sponsor’ one or more children at Epworth. When one of the two girls that the Ponders sponsored left Epworth, Bernice was chosen to take her place.
For Bernice, this was an extraordinary turn of events. From that point on, the Ponders showered her with wonderful Christmas and birthday gifts, giant chocolate egg at Easter, and new clothes each fall. They took her to their home on every holiday, and Bernice remembers what a talented cook Sarah Ponder was and how at Christmas, the home, filled with scrumptious treats, felt comforting and warm.
“The way they treated me made me feel special,” Bernice said.
The Ponders nurtured and supported Bernice even after she graduated from high school and enrolled at Winthrop College to become a social worker. To help pay her tuition, Bernice returned to Epworth each summer to assist in the cottages.
After obtaining her bachelor’s degree, Bernice worked for 28 years as a child protection case manager and administrator for the South Carolina Department of Social Services. She married and had three children, passing the values she absorbed from Epworth on to them. She made sure they went to church regularly. When her children grew up, one became a college dean, another a high school math teacher, and another, an engineer. Bernice perfected the cooking skills she learned at Epworth, winning multiple prizes at the State Fair for her culinary creations. She also won prizes for her crochet projects. Once, she won first prize for her delicious biscuits.
Although Bernice visited the Ponders in Aiken every few years following college, she eventually lost touch, which she regretted. But when she was 59 and retired, a former colleague, a social worker employed by Methodist Oaks assisted living facility in Orangeburg, called her out of the blue.
The former colleague told Bernice that by coincidence, she was talking to a couple in their mid-80s at Methodist Oaks and it turned out that they knew Bernice. Their names were Fred and Sarah Ponder. With no children of their own, the Ponders were struggling to obtain the documents required to apply for Medicaid nursing care for Fred, who was in the early stages of dementia. The social worker wondered if Bernice might have time to lend them a hand.
Bernice could not say yes fast enough.
“We were overjoyed to see one another,” she said of her first meeting with the Ponders after many years apart. “They looked older, and Sarah had lost a lot of weight. But they were the same sweet people they always were.”
Bernice helped the Ponders with their needs, and from then on, for nearly a decade, she visited them once a week to take them shopping and out to eat.
“On one of our Thursday outings, Fred said something I’ll never forget,” Bernice said. “He said, back then, all those years ago, the Lord knew you needed us. Now He knows we need you.”
Fred was 93 when he passed away, and Sarah was 95.
In her mid-80s herself now, Bernice rarely misses the annual Epworth reunion. This year, she brought along her children and grandchildren. As they do every year, she and her sister Linda led the other alumni in singing the Epworth alma mater.
To honor Bernice Porter Riggs and her sisters on Bernice’s’ 75th birthday, her children established the Porter Sisters Endowed Fund to provide scholarships for Epworth residents. The goal was to ensure that future generations of Epworth residents are able to continue their education. If you would like to discuss ways to honor or remember loved ones, please contact Lisa Fusco at lfusco@epworthsc.org or by phone at (803) 256-7394.